“Passing The Baby Around”

I was never aware this was a thing until having a baby of my own. It’s my observation—and I could be wrong, it could also not apply to all women of course—that women tend to think they’re in a way “entitled” (I put this in parentheses because I don’t think it’s entirely accurate) to holding the baby. In my opinion, this mindset should be changed. The first days after our son was born and friends and family were coming over to see him, I didn’t feel I was allowed to not let them hold him. When we went to gatherings, it was different. He was so small and I didn’t want to let him go, so I didn’t let people hold him. Because they were family, I think some of them didn’t appreciate this and felt that as family they should be allowed to. I don’t think this is true. A baby’s first year of bonding is precious and I don’t feel I should have to let anyone hold him if I don’t want to. As he’s gotten older he’ll cling to me when he doesn’t want to be given to someone else. As I’ve grown more comfortable in my position as mom, I don’t feel guilty about not letting people hold him because he feels safe with me. I don’t think parents should feel they have to let others hold their baby if they don’t want to or the baby expresses they don’t want that—even with family. The baby doesn’t know they’re family, but they’ll figure it out as they get older.

I’ve been dealing with a big up and a big down which is why I haven’t posted and have been absent from Twitter lately. The big down is my husband and I have been marital issues more often but we’ve been going to counseling. Only time will tell. But the big up is that we’re expecting our second child! We don’t know if it’s a boy or girl yet but hope to find out in the next couple of weeks. My midwife has an insane number of women she attends to every year so, understandably, she takes the month of July off and has a different midwife fill in until she gets back. Pregnancy and the heat don’t mix well, and it’s been a pretty hot summer so far. I used to be a summer girl but being pregnant two summers in a row I have not been enjoying it.

I’ve been trying to figure out how to get some writing done. Our son will be a year old in July so he’s starting to play and entertain himself more. But his day naps are much shorter. Normally I wouldn’t mind staying up later to write but I need my sleep. I have to start squeezing in some writing somehow though or there’s no way I’ll complete my goal of finishing this book before summer is over.